It seems to be my red letter day. First I get your letter, the first one I have from anyone since Nov. 17th. Also, I saw a woman, in fact three women. They were the first I had seen since we got here some months ago. If I were permitted to say how many months ago, you would see the enormousity of such event. They were with a U.S.O. show that is touring this area.
You asked me if we have any recreation or any place to go at all. The answer is an emphatic “no”. Our diversion is what we can do without deserting our post or shirking our duty. If we want to take a hike, we can usually do so. Or for recreation we can play ping pong, read, or play poker. My recreation is reading. That was all right until I grew tired of it. I grew tired of it because I didn’t want to read the same books all over again. Ha. I took up hiking, but twenty miles is a long hike and about all I can do in one day. I have seen all that is in twenty miles of here. We aren’t allowed to go hunting, besides we are not permitted to leave camp alone. One shot will not stop one of these bears around here. If the bear is very close it would take at least two rifles, firing simultaneously and making crack shots to down him in time to prevent a disaster. One can not go on an overnight outing because it is too cold, besides other reasons.
You say I don’t say anything about myself. Well, there just isn’t anything to say. I was never in better health than I am now. Even if there was some contagious and ravaging disease here I couldn’t tell it. But there is no danger of that happening. I have seen less illness here than ever before. I guess the outdoor life agrees with us.
Gee, you said you wished I could come to Dallas; and that we would go dancing. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever get to dance again. I remember so vividly that last time we danced. But unlike you, I have danced since then. I don’t believe anything could ever stop me from wanting to dance. For dancing is a medicine to me. It will ease an aching heart, or it will dull the memory of things that are better forgotten. When I feel good, dancing makes me feel better. So you may guess that all the things I miss, dancing ranks pretty high on the list. And dancing with you would be my utopia.
Dear, you mentioned the two phrases in my letter. It is best that some things never be told; so I’m glad you didn’t understand them, for I have wished that I had never put them in the letter at all. I guess I just remembered too well the last time I saw you. though I knew my affection was not welcomed and that some day you would say “Go fly a kite,” I was quite let down and felt as if I were never to be happy when you just smiled and, in a friendly way, said we were going different directions. I saw you later that day, but I’m sure you didn’t see me. As for that last pledge in Callan, “Wherever I am, whatever you may do, you can believe me, I will be someplace, awaiting your slightest beckon.” You can never say “no one cares”, for I will be on hand for that. I made one mistake that, had it been carried out, would have wreaked havoc, not only for me but Grace. I like Grace, she is a good girl. That isn’t enough for the thing we planned. So I still thank God that she met Summers. Marriage has always meant a life time job to me. It still does, regardless of how many disappointments I may find in it. A divorce can never find a place in my life.
Dearest, I wonder if you really mean all you put in your letters. I can not doubt it, for you have never been a coquette or deceiver. I only hope you didn’t write it as a matter of form. You signed the letters in a different way than ever before. Gee, but it thrilled me!
Just got your Christmas card and the photographs! Hurray! My day is complete. It is indeed a red letter day! How can all this be happening to me in one day? They are lovely. The one where you had let your hair down is my favorite. I always wanted to see you with it down. But you never gave me that pleasure. But you have said we would start all over. After the war is won. That is the term I would add to the treaty when it is signed, “just another chance.” I will be everything that you want me to be. I will be patience and devotion itself.
Yes, Alice, I have been trying to send you some pictures. Some have passed the censor here, but they have to pass a second censor. I have not got them back. So maybe they are on the way to you. But some that I sent, and didn’t get back, never reached their destination; so I can not definitely promise you will get them. Anyway, I am trying again this time and will keep on trying till maybe some day, you will get them. If there is not one in this letter, you will know the censor objected.
There is so much I could tell you if I could only see you, but alas, I can’t. So I will close for now and write again soon; and hope you do likewise.
Under present conditions, my only Christmas gift or greeting can be my best wishes for you.
With all my devotion,
P.S. Just got still another letter. Mama and Nancy “ride” to town together - on foot. Nancy is well and still living with Pat. Ha. They and Mama live together.